thedeadlyhook | One Day at a Time...

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One Day at a Time...

A Very Happy Birthday to

beanbeans!!

The final word is in on Toys's computer - DOA. I have run of the laptop for a few hours because he's in class right now, but otherwise I'll probably be pretty absent here on LJ until we get some kind of solution. It goes without saying that the mood in our household is a bit grim. Toys is practically chewed up with stress. I'm making his favorite dinner tonight, but that's about all I can do.

But my woes are tiny - the world feels a particularly sad and nasty place right now, and I can only hope for the air to change soon. Enough, please, I think we've all had enough. Enough posturing, enough tough-guy bullshit, enough guns going off. Enough of people who think they have to prove something. As if learning to live in harmony with your neighbors wasn't challenge enough.

I've been signing a lot of petitions lately; I urge everyone to do the same. There is no tomorrow until we make it happen.

The reports from the Marsters's latest con appearance have been a bright spot in my day.

elisi has compiled a nice list of links, here, including the funny photo story from the Q&A session on

mad_brilliant's journal, here. I'm still trying to nail down what it is exactly that I enjoy about JM as an actor, but if I had to guess it would be that the guy is just such a dork. He's not what I'd call classically handsome, with that big ol' head and teensy facial features, and hair that just screams bratty-boy-next-door, but he does have a fabulously expressive face, and great body language that manages to stay just this side of queenish (but not always - true story from back in my office days, when I was sporting a Spike-and-Buffy desktop: one of my coworkers saw the picture and immediately barked, "hey, is that guy gay?" This is also why I was pretty tickled to hear that he's been cast as an out gay celeb for that play in San Francisco, although I'm unlikely to see it myself, even though I'm right here in SF, because this is where my live actor phobia comes in - as I think I've said before about seeing Mark Hamill from across a room, I'm more than happy to live my whole life without knowing exactly how much taller I am than someone I've seen onscreen.) But yeah, I think the JM thing still kinda works for me, because even when he's doing that I'm-so-sexy thing, and making with the big smoulder, I can so see the kid who stood up at a con to ask Mr. Spock how his ears were pasted on. And part of me thinks that had a lot to do with what made Spike work as a character, and why "Fool For Love" made such perfect sense - it filled in a missing piece, one that you could kind of sense, if only subliminally, was always there.

David Boreanaz, on the other hand, IS handsome - he's a great-looking guy - but he does nothing for me unless he's got his full-on goofball turned on. As in the lovely Boreanz picspam over in

jascott's LJ that several people on my list have pointed to - when DB is being all grim and sex-ay on purpose, I just can't take him seriously. But when he's showing all his teeth in that big Krusty the Klown grin, looking all jocklike in some sporting jersey, standing next to Nicholas Brendon who's all like, "where am I, and why are my hands on my crotch?" That DB I find cute, in a sort of doofus, tenth-grade way. (I guess this also explains why I enjoy Angel the most when he's being ridiculously petty.)

Great discussion on Buffy's characterization in "Sanctuary", over on AtS, here. Nice to see it's not just me who thinks that characters tended to change radically when crossing over for guest appearances between shows! (Frex: I'd had huge problems with Spike's appearance in "In the Dark" on its first run - I didn't like the way Spike was suddenly cartoonishly stupid, which hadn't previously been the case on BtVS.)

Thanks to everyone who responded with such interesting thoughts on the concrit poll - I'm still ruminating on a number of incomplete thoughts there, but I keep thinking that there's something, some key truth to reach, about the social interactivity of fic writing, and how the most useful crit would ideally be tailored to the writer's goals and what the audience wants to read/talk about. Writers want feedback and discussion, but within limits, and readers want to discuss, but (guessing, because I haven't done a poll on this part yet) also within limits - they want to see their kinks met. So maybe a crit group organized almost like a message board, where you would post under specific topics? (Although now I'm wondering about the odds that this approach hasn't been tried - has it? And if so, what were the results like?)

My best thoughts go out to you all. I'm going to try to get some writing done today while I can.

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I hope you come back soon. You'll be missed.

I know what you mean about the JM/DB thing. JM isn't classically handsome at all - his head is too big, his legs are too short etc etc - but even now he looks so much older, he still does it for me in a way that the very much classically handsome DB (and any other classically handsome bloke - Alexis Denisof, for instance, who is utterly gorgeous in RL) - just doesn't. I've never really gone for classically handsome anyway. I like something quirky about my men, which is why all these Hollywood/TV pretty boys do nothing for me.

I also enjoy DB as Angel the most when he's being goofy. He's very endearing.

Re: JM in the play - have to admit, the moment I saw him in RL I knew he couldn't possibly be gay but I would still love to see him in that play. I've really enjoyed seeing some of these actors in RL and seeing JM in a real live play on stage would be a dream come true.

I've really enjoyed seeing some of these actors in RL and seeing JM in a real live play on stage would be a dream come true.

You've got more guts than I - I get very shy about the idea of coming face to face with actors. If I try to analyze why, I think it comes down to something about not being able to (or wanting to) cross the streams of "relating to this person in fiction" and "relating to this person as a real person" - in order to do one, I have to put a damper on the other. And unless I had some kind of work-related reason, I sort of don't want to puncture that fictional bubble, you know?

And thanks for the kind words. It does my heart good to know that everyone will still be here on LJ, doing their thing, even if I won't be able to peek in very often.

Same here. I find that I never want to actually meet these celebrities. I kind of like to keep them in a fictional state. Like you, I really don't want to discover that "Spike" doesn't quite reach the height of my shoulder.

I do wonder if this is different for people who don't have our height? I've always been very awkwardly aware of my size, and can't quite picture what life must be like on the other side of that - just the idea of having that whole aspect of self-consciousness missing.

shadowkat67 just made a really interesting post about the concept of body size and one's concept of self,

http://shadowkat67.livejournal.com/266926.html?nc=12

That is a really fascinating post; thanks for pointing to it! I'll have to think of something to say over there, since her experiences sound pretty similiar to mine.

On the other hand, you don't have to ask for help getting things down from high shelves in shops or fall into freezer cabinets.

Seeing JM do his Macbeth (Abdridged) was amazing. Boy owns a stage, so I'd definitely rec the experience.

Ah, yes, the shelf thing. It's nice, I'll agree. : )

You do tempt me with the stage thing, because I do love good theater.

Oh, you have to go! I'm going to get tickets as soon as they're available. We could meet at the theater! I decided a while ago that I didn't necessarily want to meet JM in person--I kind of feel like it would ruin our relationship--but seeing him live on stage? What could be cooler?

OMG, peer pressure! *g* Okay, I'll admit, it's possible I could be talked into going as part of a fangirl outing. We'll confer when tickets starting being available.

But.. yeah, I couldn't take the meeting-in-person thing. Ruin our relationship, most definitely!

I admit, I was worried when I first went to see JM, which wasn't until after AtS ended (the buzzcut era). I was afraid that once I'd seen him I wouldn't be able to write about Spike any more. But the truth is, that now I've seen him, its actually easier for me to keep him separate from Spike in my head.

Can appreciate that it wouldn't be the same for everyone.

It is probably just me being phobic - I've been to Star Trek cons (yes, me geek), and seen Patrick Stewart, George Takei, etc., and not come away with any major mental trauma, but... I dunno. Then again, I was not pleased to discover that I'm about the same height as the Incredible Hulk, so I'll always carry that scar.

Well, it's certainly true that JM is a bit of a shortarse- I'm 5'6" and I don't think he's more than an inch taller than me. However, in fanfic terms, when writing Spike, that rather suits me.

I have to agree. I've long believed that it's JM's inner dork that constantly brings a smile to my face and what levened Spike's "bad boy" in such a way that it gave Spike an inner dork and thus my undying love. :)

It's so true - I think if the whole "bad boy" thing had been done by a different actor, in the way it was probably intended, I'd have had no interest in the character at all. Even if it does play into every romantic cliche ever about the nice guy inside the rough exterior, it was there, dammit, and I couldn't help but respond to it.

Yeah. And it's more than a "bad boy with a heart of gold" thing going on. It's that "William" was...well... a dweeb. And that dweeb constructed this ubercool persona. Hell, he sort of became that ubercool persona, but he try though he might, he never managed to completely exorcize the inner dweeb. One thing I did love about the AtS finale was Spike reading his poetry. In a way it was like he'd finally found some level of acceptance for his inner geek.

One thing I did love about the AtS finale was Spike reading his poetry. In a way it was like he'd finally found some level of acceptance for his inner geek.

Oh, yes. I did love that. I didn't love a lot about that finale, but I loved that. It was just a wonderful full-circle moment.

Erm - have just re-read my comment and it comes across a little weird. Of course, JM being gay or not has no bearing whatsoever on whether I'd like to see him on stage or not.

No, don't worry, I know what you meant. Same thing as I was trying to say, I think, that it's charming to see him cross that line so fluidly and not have it be a big issue about masculinity or what-have-you.

Heh! Though interestingly, he now claims that one of his most embarrassing moments as an actor was having to say that Spike and Angel had been 'intimate.'

Not sure I believe him ,though. I think he knew perfectly well there were slashers in the audience at the con and he was throwing them titbits.

I totally agree. ACTors, I swear! Always playing to the crowd. : )

Yes, I don't for one minute believe him at the QM event either, when he pretended that he'd only just worked out that some women rather like the idea of two hot men together, the way men like to imagine two hot girls.

Playing to the crowd.

I am SORRY to hear about the dead computer--I know how much you two depend on it for work.

Thank you. It's just... gah, we've just been having a bad run of luck lately. The upside is that we'll probably come out of it with a new computer - and he's been needing an upgrade for awhile now - but financially... ouch. Really would've been nice to put this off for awhile.

On the upside, I have an appointment to talk to a career counselor, and a convention this weekend where I can pimp myself a bit to some publishers, so cross fingers for me!

Thanks so much for the birthday greeting. :)

Those are all good things to be happy about. Fandom, in the best of times, at least provides a light-hearted distraction when we need a break from the news and from RL woes.

Sorry to hear about your computer. :(

Happy writing today, and enjoy the special dinner you're preparing. *hugs*

Thank you. I hope you're having the bestest day!

I had to scroll back to about skip-180 to get caught up on my list, and there were a lot of smile-worthy items that I didn't even report here - it really did help so much. Thank god for fandom and LJ. It's a sanity-saver.

I'm making my special spicy tofu dinner - someday I'll have to post that recipe. It's essentially my homemade version of what's typically called ma-po-tofu on Chinese and Japanese menus.

Ooh yes, do share that recipe one day--it sounds delicious!

Hee- you've made me long for sushi from the local sushi bar; we're close enough to the Boston fish markets that the local sushi bar's fish selection is nothing less than stellar. Mmmm. :)

I know what you mean about DB. He is objectively really good-looking, but the only time I feel any twinge of gut-level attraction is when he's grinning maniacally.

Interestingly, though, I suspect I'd find DB more attractive in real life than JM (although Marsters' personal charisma is supposed to be pretty intense, so maybe not). JM is just such an over-sharing spaz IRL. He'd probably make a great buddy, but I suspect his personality might kill any attraction dead. However, he's a far more interesting and attractive an actor than DB, IMO.

Oh, believe me, I understand the embarrassment factor - some of the stuff I've read that he's shared at cons is pretty TMI. But then again, I have oversharing friends who throw stuff like that at me on a regular basis, so it all seems pretty familiar. : )

I'm guessing, but I suspect that DB would make me feel more self-conscious were I to meet him in person, with the big and the handsome. JM, probably my biggest worry is that I wouldn't be able to stop thinking something like, "I could bust you in half with my fingers, tiny man."

I am so sorry for your computer woes.

And I definitely see the dork in JM - one of the reasons I don't fangirl him at all. He just comes off as a loveable doof to me - so not a sex god. ;-)

DB, on the other hand, I find way sexy.

I've probably said this before, but I find Spike so much sexier than Angel, but DB a lot hotter than JM. It's a conundrum. *g*

Ah, such connumdrums. They do make life interesting. *g*

It's funny; I don't know if I fangirl any actors to speak of, just based on their handsomeness. Maybe Julian McMahon. I know I went to see Fantastic Four largely just to see him be a supervillain. I'd probably be paralyzed if I saw him in real life.

And thanks for the kind thoughts on the computer. I'm hoping that the good wishes will keep the laptop going in this time of crisis - I've had been troubles with this model in the past, so we need all the luck we can get now that we're down to one machine.

great body language that manages to stay just this side of queenish

Or not :)

But yeah, I adore JM to bits because he can go from spaz to sex-god and back in less than five seconds :) I can appreciate that DB is pretty, but I only find him attractive in maybe one in ten pictures, but JM has that something despite his funny head and his tendency to make weird faces when he talks :)

As for the height thing, my problem is quite the opposite - even Danny de Vito is taller than I am (though only maybe quarter of an inch), so I'd be intimidated to meet people like Goran Visnjic, because it's rather awkward trying to have a conversation with someone whose crotch is at your eye-level :)

On the pic: Hee, yes! Darling, a feathered hat would look SO lovely with that. *g*

And yeah, I do completely sympathize with the other end of the height scale - the very fact that I'm always told of all the things I can do, such as buy clothes that fit (actually not, because I have the same problems with proportions in the other direction) have made me understand that it's really the same problem, of feeling like the whole world is just a little too big or small.

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Yeah, I'm spazzing out a bit wondering what everyone's going on about DB being so much hotter than JM.

I think it's a taste thing - when I was a teenager, I always tended to go for the slim fellows over the big-and-burly too. Now I can at least objectively see how DB is a very handsome fellow. But awww, Johnny Depp. With you there on that cutie. I'm showing my age to admit I used to watch him on 21 Jump Street for him. Just something about that pout.

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