Jesus Is a Punk Rocker

[thedeadlyhook]

So, like, I've been working on followups to some neat questions raised in reply to my Christian Allegory in the Buffyverse essay by nazlan and glassslipper, but in the meantime, this line of thought occured to me. (Cross my heart and swear to God, I'm not trying to be blasphemous here....)


Notes on the Personality of Historical Jesus

1. Was a Rebel
Jesus made his career out of getting in the face of the ruling authorities such as Rome, the Rabbincal hierarchy, and one's own parents - not in a leading-great-armies sort of way, but more of a talk-trash-behind-their-backs (and sometimes to their faces) kind of way.

2. Had a Mouth on Him
Aforementioned career largely devoted to being Talky McTalks Alot, a mixture of very profound observations, utterly cryptic puzzle-speak, picking apart the pretentious arguments of others, and baldly emotional outpourings.

3. Was a Bit of a Showoff
Slight weakness for public histronics while performing miracles; also entry into Jerusalem riding an ass while accompanied by cheering converts waving olive branches perhaps not the world's most subtle way of hitting town.

4. Had Some Issues with Temper
Throwing the moneychangers out of the temple on the point of his shoe clearly not the most well-thought-out tactical move, but our main man J.C. was unable to keep a lid on his anger long enough to make a rational argument. Also had a tendency to snap at people who irritated Him.

5. Had a Laid Back Attitude
Enjoyed the good life when he could get it (made no complaints about having his feet annoited with oils and dried by the hair of lovely ladies, turned water into wine so He and fellow wedding guests wouldn't have to go dry); worried not at all about where his next meal was coming from (He and followers drifted from town to town relying on the kindness of strangers to house and feed them).

6. Prone to Emotional Displays, Sentimental
Multiple teary episodes; big on showing the love (the Last Supper the culimation of a relentless string of references to his own upcoming death and how his followers should carry on); equally big sometimes on heartbreak (when exiting the family nest, makes the wrenching claim to his mom that his followers were his real family). Aired his feelings often; never unmoved by a sobbing petitioner.

To clarify, I don't really think any of Season 7 BtVS was necessarily written with any of these parallels in mind. I'm just finding it kind of funny in retrospect.
; )

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[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Yes, he'd probably gob on a well-dressed merchant. They're not keepin' it real. ; )