Writercon kerfuffle

[thedeadlyhook]

Um... you know, just out of curiosity. Was there some kind of "hey, post your Writercon report directly to the writercon LJ" update that I just missed? Because I only seem to remember one about posting your links to your con remembrances. Yet now there are TWO reports posted directly in the journal, because apparently, being a straight guy who attended the con and has feelings to air somehow rates as special. Excuse me, but... wtf? [ETA: the second post is actually very sweet, and a helpful antidote to the wankery original.]

I didn't touch the original post when I first saw it. The tone absolutely screamed attention-seeker - OMG, everyone look at meeeee - so I figured, best not to give him that attention. In hindsight, though, I'm glad a lot of other people did, since the posts I've seen since then, irfikos in particular, here and here, and so many others in the original thread, have been so to-the-point and thoughtful and well-considered that hell, yes, sometimes there IS a real reason to get into a kerfuffle, and keep it going.

Crying oppression when things don't go your way is a popular tactic nowdays - in politics, especially - but it's a crybaby's tactic, wahh, I didn't get what I want, it's not all about me. Why isn't it all about me? Why aren't you all looking at me, debating about me, taking my feelings into consideration? The unvoiced part of it is always the same too, why should I have to consider your feelings? What gives you the right to think any of this is about you? You're weird and I'm not.

Yes, that's worth kerfuffling about. Grrrrr.

Comments

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

Like, dude, what's your point? I should give you a cookie for not being an asshole? Guess so. (Rahr, there's my angry feminist moment - I mean, the guy's nice, but so was just about everybody else I talked to, you know, and I'm not feeling pressured to make a big deal out of how not all women are jerks.)

I get what you're saying, and I think you're partly right. I guess there is a sort of privilege in the idea that he should be applauded simply for being male and not being an asshole. But I also think it was useful for him to point out that 1) not all straight men are bigots, and 2) WriterCon was not actually hostile to straight men; the first guy's complaints really stemmed from his own homophobia and not from the way he was treated.

Or something. I'm probably reading too much into it.

By the way, I really loved seeing you at the con. I'm so glad we had a chance to talk for a while, and I wish we'd talked longer. You're one of the people I missed saying goodbye to--it was over so fast, and it felt like I was at the airport before I could even catch my breath! (Next time I am so staying until Monday and not leaving at 3:30am Sunday night, btw).

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Ouch, 3:30! That totally explains why I didn't catch you with the Monday morning exodus - I had a late flight that day, so I got to hang out in the lobby with the last of the attendees as we all trickled out. I wish you could've been there too - it was a really fun conversation.

I was really glad to see you too - there wasn't anywhere near enough time to hang as much as I would've liked, especially after that Fanthropology panel, which brought up all sorts of neat issues, and when I went through my pictures, I was kicking myself for not getting more of you and irfikos, especially of those great outfits you had at the dance. (Oh, and I still have SF pictures to send you, mostly of the aquarium.)

But.. yeah, guy wasn't a heel, I probably should be giving him a cookie for at least standing up and saying yo, I'm a guy who's not like this and don't share these views, and that he at least didn't feel oppressed, because that's not an easy position to take either. Sometimes, I really need to curb the hothead within. (This is why I don't do message boards - if I just let my gut reaction fly a lot of the time, I'd really be in trouble.)

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

(catching up on old comments)

Man, I wish I'd stayed later on Monday. Very silly of me to go to work that day! I definitely wanted to hang around longer and participate in more of the interesting discussions.

I'd love to see the photos, if you have them around. (Heh, I've just got that horrid one of us before we got on the boat! Eternal memories. ;)