State of the Me

[thedeadlyhook]

Damn, it has been a really long time since I last posted. Ye gods. Happy Belated New Year, everyone! I guess this would be the late equivalent of my year-end taking-stock post.

It's ironic, I think: I've become more and more of a hermit, social-networking-wise, now that it's practically ubitquitous out there, what with the Facebook and Twitter, and etc., etc. The more pressure there is to be "on" all the time, the less I find myself having to say. Yes, of course I realize that this is only an imagined pressure on my part, but still - I honestly find myself thinking You know, I just want to stop and smell the flowers, or read a book, or whatever, without blogging about it, okay? As happy fun-time things go, it's starting to feel a bit too much like a job.

Which I guess is part of why I haven't been around too much. The other part is the usual fandom drift; my current television and movie viewing is poles apart from the tastes of my friendslist (I watch little on TV these days other than cooking shows, Discovery Channel, and Cartoon Network - ask me about "Worst Cooks in America"! - and I think the last film I saw in a theater was Paranormal Activity). I'm also pretty much off the Buffy fandom radar, as I'm not following the comics. (Although I did hear about the "Twilight" reveal, and have little to add that hasn't already been said by rahirah or shipperx.) I skim LJ, but rarely comment... I really don't know what to say anymore. Sigh.

On a slightly more uplifting note, I've actually started to write again.

Confession time: for quite awhile now, I've been trying to decide if I was really done with Buffy fanfic. On the surface of it, it certainly looked like it - I hadn't written anything new in months, not since the hard-drive crash that ate my last plot bunny (a shame, since I was really liking my spur-of-the-moment premise, and it went into the great unknown literally the day after it was starting to take shape, and I'd turned out a nice chunk of prose I was really pleased with), and I have WIPs on my drive that have languished for actual YEARS. But. I don't think I am quite done, not yet.

Long story short, you can thank a friend of mine, one of my few RL friends who knows about my fandom journal, for nudging me about it, because the other day, I found myself picking up the threads of my old WIP, "Action Figures and Fashion Dolls." And it was FUN. Fun to read my old notes about where that story was going to go, fun to just enjoy playing with words again. Fun to create again.

I think I'd honestly forgotten what it was like. I even feel less tired now than I have been, just from playing around with that story.

So yeah, there may be yet more Buffyfic from me in the not-too-far-off-future, cross fingers. Not that I expect anyone's been waiting for it, or should feel in any way compelled to comment even if so, as bad as I've been about commenting myself lately, but... yeah. There may be some left in me yet.

Comments

[xc-runner50.livejournal.com]

You write Buffy fic. I will said Buffy fic. :P Writing fanfiction should be fun.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

I'm all for the fun in the writing! Even moreso if the story turns out the way I've planned, because it was plotted from the get-go to be pretty crazy.

[xc-runner50.livejournal.com]

Well sounds like a plot filled fun story. I really shouldn't comment late at night also. Should read.....I will *read* said Buffy fic....in my first comment. lol

[silverusagi]

Good to hear from you!

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Good to be here. Now if only I can keep up the habit...

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

¡Yay! I'm glad you're feeling the fun. It's so true that a setback (like wonky hard drives) can make things seem insurmountable. But the reward for creative output is great and immediate. Go you!

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'll be doing my best to keep the faith. (I'm still sore about losing that story, tho. It was one of those ones where the wording was what made it work, and you know you'll never get that back. Sigh.)

[moscow-watcher.livejournal.com]

I don't want to jinx it - but I'm sooo looking forward to your Buffy fanfiction!

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Oh, no talk about jinxes! : ) Here's to hoping I can put out something that's worth looking forward to!

[asta77.livejournal.com]

I haven't written fic in ages, but have a long gestating BSG fic (as well as a new 'White Collar' plot bunny) and I hope people will still care once I get around to writing/posting it so I totally encourage you picking up where you left off. :)

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I figure the audience issue is probably isn't as important - people will either be interested or not - as the exercise of getting out those ol' trapped feelings/thoughts and finally putting them into words. So yay for continuing stories! I totally encourage you to keep going as well.

So "White Collar" is worth checking out, then? I admit to being intrigued by that one.

[asta77.livejournal.com]

White Collar is my current obsession so, yeah, I'd highly recommend giving it a try. Putting aside Matt Bomer's prettiness (he can also act), the cast, especially he and Tim DeKay, have great chemistry and the dialogue is sharp. The plots can be weak, but they at least don't insult my intelligence. And in a fandom that his heavily into Neal (Matt)/Peter (Tim), it has also embraced (in more ways than one ;), Peter's wife Elizabeth (Tiffani Thiessen). Her part on the show isn't huge and she's mostly there to support Peter (and to a lesser extent, Neal) but she's written as smart, strong and funny.

I could go on, but those are the non-spoilery highlights. :)

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Sounds good! I will definitely check it out, then.

[jwaneeta.livejournal.com]

Missed you!

I watch the bleeding Discovery Channel all day, some days (meaning I have it on while I work). I'm not keen on Mythbusters, which makes me feel like a weirdo. I've come to enjoy Cash Cab.

Perplexingly, I find I've now got it for Mike Rowe and never miss Dirty Jobs if I can help it. Deadliest Catch remains the favorite. Man vs Wild generally just makes me tense. :/

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Oh, Mike Rowe and his sexy, sexy voice. I know what you mean. : )

I do enjoy Mythbusters myself, tho, and finally saw the episode where they proved elephants actually are afraid of mice. (!) Such gems of knowledge really do add a sparkle to life.

On the Deadliest Catch addtiction, just to give you a snapshot of our household's tastes: we were hearing about Dexter from a friend, and Toys's reaction was, "why would I want to watch a show about a serial killer when I could be watching crab fishermen?"

[jwaneeta.livejournal.com]

Oh, Mike Rowe and his sexy, sexy voice.

And he self-deprecates in that sexy voice. And ever and oft he removes his grubby shirt. :D

"why would I want to watch a show about a serial killer when I could be watching crab fishermen?"

Hahahah mte.

[tabaqui]

*waves*
Hello hello!

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Hey there! Good to see you! *waves back*

[riccadonna.livejournal.com]

So nice to hear from you! I'll keep my fingers crossed for your writing...to do it for fun is the only way to go!

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Great to be back. Fingers crossed on my part too that I don't lose the momentum.

[herself_nyc]

I for one look forward to your Buffyfic!
And I sympathize with your meh feeling about updating online. I hate Facebook.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

My relationship with Facebook is weird; I rather like reading what my RL friends are up to, but rarely feel compelled to post myself... but then that makes me avoid reading, so I won't feel that pressure, or the need to comment, because that's a non-trival bit of time commitment. I suppose a lot of this would be different if I could be online during the day, which I'm not...

Y'know, in a way it reminds me of the early days of the Internet, which was pretty well divided into people who were really into it, and people to which it was an invisible thing that they had nothing to do with. I'm getting that same feel of things happening in the aether all around me, that I just don't have access to (and sort of don't want to).

Keep prodding me on the fic! I really want to get rolling on this again while the energy is there.

[herself_nyc]

You know you can send me your trial balloons to read. Or if you don't know, you know now!

[cordykitten]

I don't think I am quite done, not yet.
YAY :))

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Woo hoo! I'll take that as a vote of confidence!

[kassto.livejournal.com]

JULIE!!

Good to hear from you. I keep wanting to write you a long email, because I finally watched seasons four and five of Angel all through and wanted to tell you what I thought.

Don't post if it's a chore. I go through many phases of such.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Please do write me that long email! I'd be very curious to hear your reactions. Angel has been playing again on the morning reruns here, and I find myself surprised at how ad hoc it often seems, far more than I remembered... and I remembered always feeling that it was a bit random as a show. Interesting.

I honestly can't post if I don't feel it, so yeah, that's probably going to continue. But I'm feeling like I might be doing it more in the near future, at least for awhile...

[rahirah]

Very small squee, so as not to jinx it.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'm trying to walk that line between not getting my hopes up too much and firing my ambitions to the insane, silly levels needed for this particular task. I think the key is just feeling the fun.

[seapealsh.livejournal.com]

Glad you're back. Re Buffyverse fic - if it's Spuffy then you write it, I read it. It's that simple. And I hold onto WIPs for years.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'll do my damndest to give you a payoff for that patience. : )

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

So yeah, there may be yet more Buffyfic from me in the not-too-far-off-future, cross fingers. Not that I expect anyone's been waiting for it, or should feel in any way compelled to comment even if so, as bad as I've been about commenting myself lately, but... yeah. There may be some left in me yet.


Very good news.

I watch little on TV these days other than cooking shows, Discovery Channel, and Cartoon Network
I'm not much better, ever since the Strike I read most evenings.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Hi there!

I've been catching up on my reading too. I've gotten back on the nonfiction again, which was always my big weakness, but it makes for some fun all-purpose historical research - you never know when that sort of thing will come in handy for fiction purposes.

Oh, I do watch Burn Notice, though. Something about that particular formula really appeals to me.

[petzipellepingo.livejournal.com]

Oh, I read lots of non-fiction - especially biographies. In fact, I just finished the new Anne Boleyn bio by Alison Weir, told me far more than I ever wanted to know about death by decapitation.

[confusedkayt.livejournal.com]

Gasp! How absurdly exciting for us. :) I know exactly what you mean, though - when I think they've wrung the last useful waking minute out of me at work, I am *shocked* by how uplifting a little fic tinkering is.

*misses San Francisco, burritos, and you*

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

when I think they've wrung the last useful waking minute out of me at work, I am *shocked* by how uplifting a little fic tinkering is.

So true! I'm absurdly reminded of playing with my Barbies when I was a kid. : )

Miss you too, babe! I just wish we'd had more chance to hang out while you were here. Although from what I've seen in your occasional posts, you've been living quite the glamourous life, you future superhero, you!

[sweet-ali.livejournal.com]

I had an urge about a week ago to reread your series that began with "Dirty Back Road", which made me think of you and where you'd been. So seeing you update feels all serendipitous :)

I think most of us, who were once frequent LJers, have pared back to more of a sporadic update, which...works.

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Yep, I guess the random update thing works alright, but it's more of a bulletin format than I'd like. I miss talking to people regularly, and when you goes so long between updates, it's hard to feel like you're too out of the loop to really enter a conversation. Or maybe that's just me, sigh...

I had an urge about a week ago to reread your series that began with "Dirty Back Road"

Aw, seriously? Thank you. It's funny, though: I just recently reread all those stories myself and though "Dirty Back Road" held up okay, but the sequel story, "Does It Have to Mean Something?" had sections I found frankly unreadable and LOL-worthy. Ye gods, whatever made me write Buffy as such a hysteric?

[fishsanwitt]

::hugs::

[thedeadlyhook.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I really need those right now. It's been a week.